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Dating and Relationships

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Ten Relationship Tips You Wish You Were Told Sooner

When we become teenagers, we start looking for candidates who can complete our lives. This can probably be the first mistake many people make when starting their dating life. Instead of looking for someone to be your other half, you will have wok work on becoming whole, so you don’t need others and can start a relationship that is based on trust and not dependency. Chances are that your parents tried to explain some of these relationship tips before, but you were simply not ready to listen. It is, however, not too late today. Read them below.

You Can’t Rush Love

For many young people, having a relationship is  a confirmation that they are wanted and valuable. If you are in a competition with your friends who can get married or find someone special first, you are doing everything wrong. In fact, you will certainly need to be more picky than you are when you are a teenager. You are likely to change your mission and your values, and eventually distance yourself from old friends and relationships. Take your time and you will hurt less.  

People Change

Unfortunately, people change. You might promise someone that you will always love them when you are 17, but you simply can’t keep the promise. You might change because of school, education, or having to step up to a new role. If your current partner is not able to move on with you, it might be time to stop trying to convince them that your way is the best. Likewise, people change and will become less appealing. They take on habits that drive you mad, or develop a superior feel around you.

Some People Never Change

While most people change until they die, some of them will never be able to. If they are too set in their ways and don’t like to compromise, they will expect you to adjust. There’s nothing you can do to get them to see your view, and conflicts will appear. If you feel like your partner has become used to doing things the same way and you have embarked on a journey of self development, you might not feel comfortable around them any more.

You Can’t Have a Good Relationship without Being Your Own Friend

People often look at relationships as a solution to their problems and mental health issues. Unfortunately, you will need to learn to befriend yourself before you can develop a healthy relationship with others. If you are not happy with your life, you are more than likely to express your dissatisfaction in front of your partner. If you don’t respect yourself enough, you can’t expect others to do so, either.

First Impressions Matter

You might think that you will have to be yourself and expect others to accept you as you are. While honesty is important, if you would like to impress a potential partner and are going on a date, you have about three seconds to convince them that you are the right person for them. This is why you will have to adopt a good personal hygiene and grooming routine, so you can always be ready to be judged.

You Should Only Change for Your Own Good

If someone wants to change you in a relationship, you have to ask yourself whether or not this change will benefit you or them. Chances are that if they are trying too hard to change you, they are looking to see someone else in your place. You need to be on board with the change, and make sure that it serves your personal development. If you have a partner who is looking to help you get a better job, this might be fine, but if they want you to change your personal style or your values, you should run.

You Can Be Different

You need to accept your personality and your appearance before you can act confident among potential partners. You can be different, and still attractive. After all, there’s got to be something that makes you stand out from the rest of men, and capture the attention of people around you. However, this doesn’t mean that you can be argumentative, confrontational, or offensive.

Insecurity Damages Relationships

If you are not secure in a relationship or not sure what you would like to get out of your life, you will experience conflict often. Likewise, if your partner is not happy with their place in life and is always jealous, you can’t do anything to convince them. There’s something wrong with their own self esteem and image, not your attitude and personality.

Rejection Is Not Always Bad

As you get older, you will notice that you have had some lucky escapes. You will attend the high school or college reunion and meet people you used to like or even went out with, seeing who they become. You might see women you respected letting themselves go and tying up a man with kids. You simply wish you could tell the guy what vasectomy procedure is and remind them that they are not slaves, but equal partners in a relationship.

Burning Bridges Is Never Smart

No matter how many of your relationships break up, you should not hold the grudge. Instead, part as friends and decide whether or not to stay in touch. This doesn’t mean that you need to have a list of exes you can go back to if your current relationship is not working. Simply accept your differences and move on without being angry with each other. If you carry the hurt to your next relationship, you are more than likely to fail building trust and a meaningful connection.

Relationships don’t come with a user guide, nor do people. It is likely that you will make loads of mistakes before you find the person who is supposed to be on your side. Be sure to accept yourself and become your own friend before going out there looking for a partner.

Taking Care of Yourself After a Tough Breakup

Breakups are always hard. Especially if you’ve been together for a long time and made commitments to each other. Learning to live alone, without someone by your side can always be difficult. But, some breakups are much worse than others. Unfortunately, most of us are at some point in our lives involved in a bad breakup. The kind where nothing is agreed upon. Where you thought you were happy and your whole life comes crashing down. The sort of breakup that breaks your heart, and your spirit. The kind that you don’t think that you’ll ever be able to recover from.

When this happens, it can be hard to get out of bed in the morning. It can be tough to see how you are going to carry on with your usual life when something so dramatic has changed, and you just want to cry underneath your duvet. But, you need to. Here are some tips to help you take care of yourself when your heart is breaking.

Let Yourself Be Sad

When you are dealing with a breakup, it’s important to let yourself grieve. Not just for the relationship, but for the life that you are leaving behind. Nothing will quite be the same anymore, and it’s ok not to be ok. Let yourself be sad, let yourself wallow and let yourself grieve. Don’t feel like you have to be normal and happy straight away, and don’t let society pressure you into moving on before you are ready.

Draw a Line

At some point, you will be ready to lift your head again. You’ll feel ready to take the next step and to start rebuilding your life. This is when it’s time to draw a line. This could mean speaking to Leading Divorce Solicitors. It might mean returning a box of your ex’s’ stuff. It could just be telling your family about the breakup. Whatever it is, do it, and then leave the wallowing behind.

Get Lots of Sleep

You’ll have heard the saying “everything looks better in the morning,” and after a good night’s sleep, this is usually true. Sadness and grief take a lot out of you. You’ll be physically and mentally exhausted. Make sure you get plenty of rest and sleep, and your mind will be able to process things more clearly. You’ll start to feel better for it.

Eat Well

bowl of cereal with sliced fruits and spoon

It’s only too familiar to fall into bad eating habits when we’re going through something. We start binging on comfort food. We eat take outs, and we snack on sugary treats. This won’t help. The odd treat is great but try to stick to a healthy and balanced diet. You don’t need any food guilt making you feel worse, or digestion issues hitting at the worst possible time.

Get Some Exercise

Exercise has so many benefits. It can help to keep you fit and healthy, but it also gives you a great chance to think and process and helps look after your mental health. It also gives you a fantastic way to meet people and an enormous confidence boost.

The Pros & Cons Of Getting Married

I know there are lots of you reading this that might be at the point in your life where you’re thinking about settling down and getting married. Or, more specifically, you’re wondering whether or not this is right for you. So, to help you make your decision, here are the pros and cons of getting married:

Pro: It’s the ultimate commitment

Marriage is a great way to prove to one another that you’re in a fully committed relationship. No matter how long you’ve been together for, if you don’t get married, then it could mean there’s always a slight commitment issue there. If you want to prove your love to eachother, this is the best way.

Con: It’s the ultimate commitment!

On the flip side, you might be scared by the commitment that comes with marriage. If you’re not ready to commit, then it’s definitely not for you. But, some people get overwhelmed by the concept of marriage that it ruins the relationship. If you feel overburdened by the thought of the commitment, then it might be better for you if you don’t tie the knot.

Pro: You get two gorgeous rings

If you get married, then you end up with two beautiful rings to symbolize your undying love. They stay with you wherever they go, which is really quite a lovely thing. The engagement ring is normally the fancier of the two, as you can see from the engagement rings at 77 Diamonds, they tend to come with big fat diamonds. The wedding band is more subtle, yet very elegant. It might seem like a strange advantage of being married, but loads of people love having these rings and keeping them close by.

Con: You lose your identity

I’m not saying this happens to everyone, but there’s definitely an argument that marriage causes you to lose your identity. Especially if you take their name, it’s like you become a different person. You may find yourself looking in the mirror and wondering where the old you has gone.

Pro: Married couples get more rights

In lots of countries, married couples have more rights than ones that are just together. I’m talking mainly about benefits and taxes, etc. When you’re married, you’re entitled to certain things that you can’t get when you’re not married. So, from a more financial point of view, marriage is a great thing.

Con: Marriage is expensive

Speaking of finance, marriage can be a pretty expensive journey to embark upon. Mainly, it comes in the form of your wedding. They tend to be very costly, meaning most married couples end up struggling for money in the first few months afterward.

I’m by no means suggesting marriage is bad, and I’m also not trying to persuade you all to get married! At the end of the day, it all depends on the individuals in a relationship. If you think marriage is right for you, then you can see the benefits it brings. If not, then you can see some of the negative you won’t have to deal with!

Why It’s Amazing Finding A Soulmate

Soulmates are the biggest gift we can have in our life. They can be the best friend we ever had, the person we want to see every second of the day and someone we can rely on when things get tough in life. Having a soulmate is truly a gift, and whether you find it in a romantic partner or best friend, it can be something to hold onto for the whole of your life. Here are some of the reasons why it is amazing to find your soulmate in life and keep them in your life.

They love you for you

The main thing which you can gain from having someone you can call a soulmate in your life is the fact that they will love you unconditionally. It can be hard to find someone who will stick with you through thick and thin and even find the good in you at your darkest. We all long to have someone who embraces all of our flaws and doesn’t spite them, and that is exactly what a soulmate can bring us. If you can find someone who loves you no matter what, hold onto them with all you have.

They can understand your quirks

Everyone is different and everyone is unique, and we all have those random little quirks which we don’t realise we are doing which everyone will see as odd. It might be the way you wrinkle your nose when you are confused, how you wipe your feet before putting on shoes or how you cry at adverts on the TV. Someone out there will recognise all of these things that you do and they will love you for it.

They are your best friend

The best thing about having someone you can call your soulmate is the fact that they become the best friend you ever had. You can look on sites such as Megamates.com and these can help you find a person who loves the same things as you and appreciates the same things that you do. You will laugh together, spend your days together and always have each others back. What more could anyone want?

You can tell them anything

When we are going through a tough time or we simply don’t feel happy in any aspect of our lives, it can be incredibly hard to get by when we have no one to share things with. When you have a soulmate you also gain a trusted confidant who you are able to spend time with and tell anything. They won’t judge you or criticise you for your feelings, they will simple respect you and support you when you need them the most.

You can spend your life with them

The best benefit of all when you finally find a soulmate is the fact that you can happily spend your life with that person. There are never times when you feel as if you are drifting apart because you both need and love each other enough to make it work no matter how long you might go without seeing each other. Having a soulmate is the best feeling in the world.

You’ve Got a Friend in Me: Simple Ways to Show Appreciation to a Loved One

Human connection is everything. You could have the biggest house, the best job, plenty of money and all of the material things you ever wanted- but without people you love and care about around you it really means nothing. One of the best things we can do in our adult lives is to cherish and nurture the friendships and connections we have, our loved ones introduce us to things we might never have heard of, teach us new things and can broaden our perspective by offering a different point of view. When you find good people, it’s important to hold onto them and of course, being a good friend in return is the way to do that. Listen, provide advice and support when needed and generally be there for them. But if you’re looking for some extra little things you can do to show appreciation, here are some ideas.

Give them a gift

Whether it’s to celebrate a special occasion or ‘just because’- a gift is a wonderful way to show someone you’ve thought about them. An accessory such as a belt, a wallet or John Henric ties for men are an good choice for guys. They’re nice things that will be used and appreciated but you don’t need to know their exact tastes or clothing sizes. If you choose a plainer or classic design then it’s something that everyone will love. For women, jewellery is always a good choice, as is perfume if you know their style. A bunch of flowers, chocolates and alcohol are also things that go down well, or you could make your own gift. These kinds of gifts aren’t about monetary value, but are a token of appreciation, a little something that tells them ‘I saw this and thought of you’.

Write them a letter

We live in an age of instant gratification, and when it comes to communication we can generally speak to people whenever we want. A message on social media, a text or whatsapp message, even a video call. This is of course fantastic, it’s actually something that we probably take for granted. Having the ability to easily contact the ones we love, no matter where they are in the world truly is amazing when you think about it. However, there are downsides. It can mean that it’s quantity over quality with our communication, and unlike the days of snail mail we never sit and properly write out our uninterrupted thoughts as we’re getting instant replies. A really nice gesture would be to write your loved one a letter, something they can cherish and keep and that really sums up why you love and appreciate them. Get a piece of paper and write it up in your neatest handwriting and seal it in an envelope. Since this is something that’s so rare these days you get the novelty factor of it, and it’s a beautiful way to really express your thoughts and feelings towards the person you care about.

Cook them a meal

There’s nothing quite like good food, good drinks and good company. If you’re looking to spend some quality time with someone, why not cook a delicious meal and enjoy it with some wine and great conversation? The internet is home to lots of recipe ideas for all skill levels, simply follow the instructions exactly and you’re guaranteed a delicious meal every time. You could find out their favourite meal and cook that, or introduce them to something you love. Otherwise, things like pasta, steak and chicken are all solid options that most people will enjoy.

50 First Dates: Choosing The Perfect Restaurant For A Rendezvous

First dates get the heart pumping. Will we have something to talk about? Will it be awkward? Will he kiss me? There is nothing like the adrenaline of meeting a potential love interest for the first time. But, the wrong environment can ruin the whole experience. And, there is no second chance to make a first impression. That’s why they call it a first impression, guys! Maybe you don’t put a lot of thought into the subject because there are bigger fish to fry. However, it is something to bear in mind at all times if you want the rendezvous to go swimmingly.

Here are the tips to remember.

No Man’s Land

It’s tempting to pick a place which you love. After all, it’s a fantastic way to show off it everything goes to plan. Should it not, the date may not reflect well on you and a second meeting may be off of the cards. Usually, it’s better to choose somewhere neither person has eaten before. Sure, it may be a flop food-wise, but at least you’ll experience it together for the first time which is a bonding experience. Also, go for a cuisine that isn’t too niche. Not everyone enjoys spicy Mexican dishes.

Casual And Classy (Ish)

Again, the desire to impress will make you think that a five-star joint is an excellent choice. In reality, it may be overkill. For one thing, the other person may not have a clue how to act. As silly as it sounds, there is a way to present oneself in a Michelin-starred restaurant. When things get awkward, that is when the date goes sideways. Plus, remember that you barely know this person. So, it’s important not to act as if the first date is your 50th wedding anniversary. Classy is good, but casual and open are better.

Licenses

“We’ll have the house bottle of red, please.” No, you won’t because not all restaurants serve alcohol. It depends on the license, and, unfortunately, some establishments serve food only. As sad as this is going to sound, it may put a dampener on the evening. Drinking isn’t mandatory, but it loosens everyone up enough to have an enjoyable time. How can you tell if they are alcohol-friendly? Liquor liability is part of restaurant insurance and can be found on the website. Alternatively, you can pick up the phone and ask, or go in and speak to them face-to-face. How novel!

Focus On Fun

Conversation and food aren’t the only things on the menu. A date is about having a good time and enjoying each other’s company. Therefore, let the restaurant do the hard work by choosing a place with a relaxed vibe. A teppanyaki joint is a perfect illustration. When there is a lull in the conversation, you can count on the chef to add to the atmosphere. Other examples include tapas bars with flamenco dancers and a jazz bar with live music.

All that’s left to ask is, are you nervous? You should be; it’s the first date!